<link rel="stylesheet" href="//fonts.googleapis.com/css?family=Roboto%3A300%2C400%2C500%2C700%7CRoboto+Slab%3A400%2C700">Scientific pick-up tips - Filthy Monkey Men

Recently I examined an article that suggested we may sexually imprint on our parents and seek out mates similar to them (or at least I like to think I examined it and didn’t just waffle for 700 words).

Amidst all the talk of “population homogeneity” and “assortive mating” I saw some observations about what people look for in partners.

So I’ve removed all the talk of “population homogeneity” and “assortive mating” and now present you with some scientific pick-up tips based on these observations.

Man seeking woman

So let’s say your a man looking for a woman. How can you use your height to your advantage? And I don’t mean by making her cower into submission. That, generally speaking, is frowned upon.

The impact of the subject’s height on the ideal height difference was negative in females.

In other words, the smaller a woman the larger a height difference between them and their mate they wanted. So what does this mean for you, Casanova?

Well if you’re tall, seek out a smaller than average woman since they like it large (no, not like that. Or maybe exactly like that, depends on the girl). The closer you are to average male height, the closer to the average female height you should be looking for. For a tall woman, be their height – the existence of a height difference isn’t especially important for them.

Hopefully the fact that the height difference between you and her is ideal will give you a keen advantage over the lankier (or stumpier) competition, but I can only get you in.You still have to work your charm.

Woman seeking man

So now you’re a woman looking for a man (I won’t question the sudden transformation, I’m very open minded). How can you use your height to bag the bloke? Well, here things get complicated.

For males…[there are] two predictors of the ideal partner’s height: mother’s height as the principal predictor and subject’s height as the secondary predictor.

So if you want to ensure you’re going for the guy who’ll like your height you have to meet their mother. Typically this is done after you’ve picked someone up, hence the difficulty. Most people don’t take their mothers clubbing, so you’re unlikely to garner the required  information as you tear up the dancefloor.

Might I recommend going on the prowl (that’s a technical term) at a wedding or other event you can see their family? There, whilst avoiding any judgemental glares from grandparents, look for a man whose mother is a similar height to you. The research suggests that men like women who are of a similar height to their mother.

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